We have all seen movies and shows of hot, steamy sex scenes. The first thing we think of is that isn’t real. It’s just Hollywood.
We all want to please our partners and ourselves in the bedroom. It’s a normal desire to want to pleasure ourselves and others, especially those we love. But how do we do that and with all the raw desires that comes with sex and attraction?
Well……you can have amazing sex with your partner if you follow some simple rules.
Confidence – This is a big characteristic in any walk of life, and its no difference in the bedroom. Words and actions from a confident level go a long way to great sex. When you are sure of what you want, when to take charge, when to let go and when to just relax and enjoy makes the experience so much more enjoyable and fluid. Remember when you first started having sex? All the questions. All the starts and stops to figure out what position to be in, how to do this move, that move. What do I say, when do I say it? It doesn’t make for a fun experience.
- Foreplay – Yummy! Guys tend to forget this and go straight for the goods. Well women sometimes don’t know proper foreplay either. Take your time, tell your partner to relax and enjoy what you’re about to do to them. Use your hands, mouth (also for sexy talk) and maybe a few toys to spice up the experience like a roleplay mask or feather wand?
- Communication – And we don’t mean about world events. Some partners are afraid to talk during sex for fear of killing the momentum, or perhaps embarrassing their partner. Well lack of communication can allow for a bad experience when we are being sexually satisfied by our partners. Who wants to experience that when only a few words or moans can make it better? You know what you want to do to your partner, but ask what they want you to do. That is erotic and sexy to please your partner in a way maybe you didn’t know they wanted. Also communication includes moans, and what sometimes can be words that aren’t quite legible.
- Make Eye Contact - And then more eye contact. To look in your partners eyes and show them how you are locked into the moment plus be able to see how you make them feel without saying a word is AMAZING!
- Talk Dirty - Yup, you can learn how. This is right up there with communication. Dirty talk allows you to role play and be someone else for a moment. What's sexy about dirty talk is you taking charge and telling your partner (without asking) what naughty things you want to experience from them. That again shows confidence and lowers inhibitions as your partner wants to please you and vice-versa.
- Sex Is Not Just For The Bedroom – Amen! You don’t always need to be lying down for great sex. And we all want to be surprised with a quickie from time to time that doesn’t always mean going into the bedroom.
- Take The Lead – Sometimes its fun to lead the experience. We all love to do as we’re told by our partners because its easy. Telling our partners what to do is also fun as they will enjoy being dominated just as much as we do.
- Experiment – Like In Science Class. Well maybe not exactly. When you have trust for your partner, try some new activities. Role playing, toys – or new toys, dominating/submissive behavior to name a few. There are many erogenous areas of our bodies. Take time to find them – creatively. One toy that is becoming more popular are anal plugs. Start small. You’ll be amazed at how much of a better feeling you will have orgasming with a butt plug, or finger in you. Talk about what each of you feel comfortable trying. You can’t say you don’t like it until you try it!
- Lube – Kinda Like For Your Car. Occasionally we all need to feel more slippery. Lube should be a staple for every bedroom. Using it doesn’t diminish the fun, in fact it can add to it. One fun way to use lube is during anal play. Yes you need it for anal sex and anal toys, but you also need it when using a finger to pleasure your partner. And pleasure them you should in the caboose. Insert a finger gently just before orgasm. They’ll thank you later!
- Orgasm Isn’t The Goal - But It Is Nice. Who said sex ends with an orgasm? Not all of us can orgasm when we want to. That’s completely normal and ok. Men and women both don’t need to orgasm to say they had a great time enjoying each others bodies, smells and tastes. Just relax, and enjoy each other. Orgasm is a bonus, and don’t put pressure on making it happen.
- Smell Pretty – The sense of smell is important when setting the mood. Part of our imagination is triggered by sexy fragrances. It’s not difficult to put in an effort to smell good for your partner, whether it be a body spray or just scented candles.
- Put On Lingerie - To Take It Off. Nothing is more sexy or romantic to get us in the mood then to see our partner get excited by skimpy clothing that barely covers our naughty bits! And if our partner is excited to see us, then we return the feeling and get our juices flowing!
- Keeping In Shape - Boosts Adrenaline And Performance. We’re not talking running a marathon every month shape, just doing some aerobic activities throughout the week that over time it allows us to last longer in bed and have hours of glorious sex instead of 10 minutes and calling it a night. We’ve all been there when we’re “too tired” for sex.
Much fun & love in the bedroom!